"Owe no one anything except to love one another," so said the Apostle.
Yesterday was my birthday. it was not an auspicious one (18, 21, 30, 40, 50, 60, 65, 70, 75, or 80). Just a regular, common or garden birthday. I had a wonderful day from waking to sleeping. I felt very glad, warm and fuzzy, rambling through the day in a gentle cloud of well-being.
I was taken by surprise by the sheer amount of affection sent my way by so many people—old friends, new friends, former students, former foster kids, and family, of course.
Affection is an important way of loving, and perhaps the least noticed or appreciated. Books are legion on romantic love. Altruism, compassion, and charity have their champions. But, affection? C.S. Lewis said of affection that is like a favorite pair of old slippers! Comfortable. Hardly noticed. Yet, oh so welcome at the end of a hard day on your feet, or a cold morning when the floor feels a little icey.
Affection is not the love of grand gestures. It is not the over-heated love of new romance. You may "fall in" to that kind kind of love. Nor does affection have the intensity of compassionate acts when your heart feels like it is breaking becasue of the plight of some needy Other.
Affection, rather, creeps up on you when you are unaware. As I write I am looking at Jack the little pug we rescued a few months ago. My feelings? A warmth somewhere deep inside. A kindness toward. I can't help a little smile. When we rescued him we were motivated by compassion. He had been ill-treated. He had a few bad manners. As a pug, he's not up to "show standard." He's mishaped. We call him affectionately our little belly-flop (the name given to misshapen Jelly Bellies). We didn't know how he would fit in with the household, or whether we could manage his behavior. He was in bad shape and needed help. That was it as far as we were concerned. At the beginning we felt compassion, with no real relationship with this waif and stray. Of course, compassion too is a way of loving, but that's not my point at the moment. As time passed affection crept up on us as is its way. Jack grew on us as we got to know him.
Affection is the love that oils life. Things go more smoothly. A life without affection must be a poor life indeed.
Whe the Apostle said, "Owe no one anything except to love one another," I don't know whether he had affection in mind. If he hadn't, I wish he had. And whether he had nor not, I shall read it that way!
Today (54 years-old and one day) I feel immensely grateful to know so much affection. I'm glad I noticed it.
Notice the little things. All shall be well.
+Ab. Andy
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